Relocation Now!

Sam Sykes ~ 07/07/2025

Last week, I wrote about a few cities in the  United States that have NFL teams, but should really consider moving. This week, I thought it would be cool to list the cities that really do need or deserve an NFL team.

Portland, Oregon

Starting off with the weakest of the bunch, Portland Oregon. Technically more people live in the Rose City than live in Atlanta making it the 28th largest city in America. They already have a professional basketball team and an NFL team could thrive in the hardcore fanbase environment. That being said, football doesn’t really fit the vibe of a town built on alternative music and coffee. But then again, nobody ever thought Seattle could have a team.

 ~ The Jacksonville Jaguars relocate and becomes the Rose City Beavers ~

Cornhuskers Beware

When the Nebraska Cornhuskers college football team is not playing, Lincoln, the city where the team plays, has a population around 300,000. But when it’s gameday that booms to over 400,000. Over 100,000 people from all over the state travel to see the men in red. Now I’m not suggesting the big bad NFL overlords come in and steal the spotlight, but instead, move 60 miles east to Omaha on the border of Iowa. It boasts just a little more people than Miami, has low taxes, and a fanbase willing to drive hours to see a team play.

~ The Cleveland Browns leave Ohio and become the Omaha Spikers ~ A Badass homage to the men that drove the stakes into the Union Pacific Railroad all the way through Nebraska. The imagery and logos alone should make this one a reality.

Sloppy Seconds in St. Louis

Crime and shittiness abound under the “Gateway to the West”, making this one a tough sell. The Rams failed miserably there and scurried back to the sunshine of California as soon as possible, playing only 21 seasons in St. Louis. It would be nice to see a team here, but the collapse of the Rams makes it nearly impossible to make that kind of investment. I could see a team in another shitty market making a move here. 

~ The New Orleans Saints or The Green Bay Packers make a move, but keep their names ~

OKC

There has never been a better time for an NFL team to consider moving to Oklahoma City. Fresh off the Thunder’s win as NBA champions the local fanbase is energized and engaged. I would lean into their success even more, naming the new team the “Lightning”. Thunder and Lighting rolling across the plains. 

~ The Tennessee Titans relocate, drop the hideous color scheme, and become the OKC Lightning ~

Chicago II

So this is not really a “new” city, but it would be a new team. I think Chicago could use a second team, or a first team depending on how the Bear’s potential mini-relocation 40 miles away to Arlington Heights pans out. With the Bears abandoning Soldier Field it would be a great chance for a small market team to move in. That is an awesome historical stadium, but does not fit with the modern world of a new 10 billion dollar stadium every ten years, the era we seem to be moving into. The Bills would be a great play here. I know they have the Bills’ Mafia and hardcore fanbase, but even with all the recent success, the market is trash. Can you imagine how energized Chicago would be to watch Josh Allen destroy there? 

~ The Buffalo Bills move and become the Chicago Bills ~

Mormonland Grows

Salt Lake City, Utah now has two professional sports teams in the NHL (Mammoth) and NBA (Jazz), with all the newfound growth and modernization there, an NFL team is not only needed, it’s expected. It’s just a matter of time. My guess is the Arizona Cardinals follow in the Utah Mammoth’s footsteps by rebranding and moving North. 

~The Cardinals leave Phoenix and become the SLC Frost ~

7. Number 7 gets a team

It’s funny how this worked out, the seventh city on this list is also the seventh biggest city in the United States. San Antonio, Texas really should have a team, their minor league UFL team averages almost 30 thousand fans per game, and that’s insane. I know Texas already has two teams, but a third team in its biggest city just makes sense. I would take the poor guys that have to play in DC and send them down to a place that treats football like a religion. 

~ The Washington Commanders return to the badass name honoring Indians and relocate to become the San Antonio Redskins ~

The Revenge Team

When the Chargers left San Diego because they couldn’t squeeze even more money out of the city, the fans went crazy. Diehard love turned to pure hatred. Free tacos with every Chargers loss was posted on every block. When they announced the move the attendance plummeted and every home game was so cheap, that opposing fans were buying tickets and controlling the home field “advantage”. This is where Denver has a chance to do something insanely funny and smart. They are now a middling to struggling market, with no upswing in sight. As division rivals to the Chargers in the AFC West, they could relocate and force the Chargers to play in some of the most hostile and volatile environments possible. Can you imagine if both teams are on the bubble trying to make a wildcard (Mahomes and the Chiefs will always win the division) and the Chargers have to play their best football in the craziest and wildest environment possible? What a game that would be. Trash all over their sidelines, never-ending heckling, and beefed up security. A man can dream. 

~ The Denver Broncos relocate to become the San Diego Electric Broncos ~